The Air Around An Object Controls It's Shape, Benny...

...but smoothing the cheek of reality has it's dangers.

If you dream in the curiously muted colours of 70s comics, gaze stupefied with wonder at the background stupidity of the universe which remains constant in whichever direction one looks, if you envy the dusty interior of hens and goats, or are just plain stripy, then Jack Marsden, The Caterer, may well have the interior monologue that you wish echoed round the empty cathedrals of yr brain.

Lipstick For Dogs

20 Records That Are Probably Making The Neighbours Rue The Day The Sun Came Out And Everyone Opened Their Windows Again*

Ashtray Navigations - Johnny Fuckoff Minotaur (Memoirs Of An Aesthete)
Zaimph - Death Blooming Pleasure (No Fun)
Richard Youngs - Like A Neuron (Dekorder)
Moritz Von Oswald Trio - Vertical Ascent (Honest Jon's)
Sun Araw - Heavy Deeds (Not Not Fun)
Ramleh - Switch Hitter (Broken Flag/Black Rose)
The Deep Blue - Sun Worshiper (The Church Within)
Fireball - Blessed Be (High Roller Society)
Voltigeurs - Voltigeurs (Turgid Animal)
Neokarma Jooklo Trio - Time's Vibes (Conspiracy)
Astral Social Club - #13/#18/#19 (Astral Social Club)**
Golden Jooklo Age - Ritual (8mm)
Flower Corsano Duo - The Four Aims (VHF)
Tropa Macaca - Fiteiras Suadas (Qbico)
Noveller - Paint On The Shadows (No Fun)
Ax - Nova Feedback (Freek)
Rhodri Davies & Ingar Zach - Ieirll (Qbico)
Yob - The Great Cessation (Profound Lore)
Nackt Insecten - Corridor Voyager (Memoirs Of An Aesthete)
Pombagira - Black Axis Abraxas (Withered Hand)

*They do listen to some right shit though, so I don't feel particularly guilty.

**I know that's 3 albums. I don't care. They all sound like excerpts from the longest and best piece of music ever, a dip into a different plane where everything sounds like gargling diamonds and the sky smells of green and purple...

Ladies & Gentlemen, It's Got Eight Limbs & A Distributed Brain, It Shouldn't Be Able To Survive Out Of The Water, And Yet It Thrives!

Tell yr friends. Come witness the return of the mighty

Oh yes, Octopus finally returns to the lovely (if somewhat echoey) Cafe Oto, with a rather fucking fine line-up consisting of:

Craig Tamlin - Drums/Percussion
Shura Greenberg - Double Bass
Andrew John - Electric Bass
Shabaka Huthchings - Bass Clarinet/Tenor Saxophone
Oren Marshall - Tuba
Illi Adato - Percussion
Gareth Wilkins - Arp/Moog/Rhodes
Lee Knight - Guitar

So why not come along, enjoy some excellent organic locally brewed ales or the marvellous Normandy ciders and immerse yrself in the world of the Octopoda.

You Need To Come To This, As It's Going To Be Very, Very Good Indeed

Once More Unto The Grosvenor Dear Friends

The Phillip Best Of The Legal World?

The alarmingly faced individual pictured above is Prof. Christopher M. Fairman of the Moritz College of Law, Ohio State University, and, for a lawyer, he's an interesting chap, having published such notable articles/papers as "No McJustice for Fat Kids", "Heightened Pleading" (which is a power electronics title seeking sonic realisation if ever I heard one), and, most fantastically of all, "Fuck", which, in the words of the abstract;

is as simple and provocative as its title suggests: it explores the legal implications of the word fuck. The intersection of the word fuck and the law is examined in four major areas: First Amendment, broadcast regulation, sexual harassment, and education. The legal implications from the use of fuck vary greatly with the context. To fully understand the legal power of fuck, the nonlegal sources of its power are tapped. Drawing upon the research of etymologists, linguists, lexicographers, psychoanalysts, and other social scientists, the visceral reaction to fuck can be explained by cultural taboo. Fuck is a taboo word. The taboo is so strong that it compels many to engage in self-censorship. This process of silence then enables small segments of the population to manipulate our rights under the guise of reflecting a greater community. Taboo is then institutionalized through law, yet at the same time is in tension with other identifiable legal rights. Understanding this relationship between law and taboo ultimately yields fuck jurisprudence.

And which can be downloaded here if it sounds like yr sort of thing...

Wunderful Meat

I'll be posting an enormous rant about lazy fucking musicians in the guise of a review of the latest (and absolutely shit-yr-pelvis-out fantastic) Nackt Insecten LP, Quantum Odyssey*, in the next couple of days. I would have finished it tonight, but I'm too stoned and too full of vodka to rant in the precise manner the subject requires, so instead I thought I'd tell you my method for cooking the perfect steak. It reads like it's far more of an arse-around than it actually is, so try it out, you won't regret it, and you'll never cook steak another way again.

In addition to the meat, which should preferably be at room temperature, you will need:

One frying pan
One large pot
One ziploc bag (or any plastic bag you can tie a waterproof knot in, is big enough to fit the steak in, and no longer contains cocaine) per steak

Season the meat with whatever floats yr boat, put the steaks into the bags, chuck in a bit more seasoning, squeeze all the air out of the bag and seal it.

Fill the pan with hot water and (this is the Heston Blumenthal method) using yr thermometer and yr masterful control of the gas hob, or (stoner's method) put the pan in the oven and set the thermostat, heat the water to 55C/130F (if you like it rare-medium rare, if you like it another way check this handy table for the requisite temperature).

Chuck the bags in the water. Leave for half an hour**. Have a nice glass of wine and possibly another. Or maybe a joint. Or both. You've got 28 minutes or so to kill.

When time's up, heat up yr pan, chuck in whatever fat or oil you prefer (and whiskey, if y're so inclined and have a fire extinguisher handy), take the steaks out, throw 'em in the pan and fry the bastards 'til they look like a steak should on the outside.

Let them rest for five minutes or so, then consume with extreme delight.

This method works with lamb and veal as well, which I intend to try out as soon as possible.

*It's on Blackest Rainbow, and it's stupidly limited and probably sold out, but I urge you to track this down if you have any room in yr soul for deeply psychedelic mung.

**Or a bit longer if it's a particularly thick lump of flesh.

***I wouldn't try it with pork though, unless you fancy sharing yr digestive tract with a segmented friend.

South London Psychedelic Slugfest

Extended hour plus sets from both bands.
Ramleh 10" EP for full price ticketholders.
Morgen Und Nite cdr for all comers.

http://www.wegottickets.com/event/45833 for the £10 tickets

http://www.wegottickets.com/event/46247 for the £7 - no 10" tickets.

Synthesis, 17th Century Style

"Wee have also Sound-houses, wher we practise and demonstrate all Sounds, and the Generation. Wee have harmonies which you have not, of Quarter-Sounds, and lesser Slides of Sounds. Diverse Instruments of Musick likewise to you unknowne, some sweeter than any you have; Together with Bells and Rings that are dainty and sweet. Wee represent Small Sounds as well as Great and Deepe; Likewise Great Sounds, Extenuate and Sharpe; Wee make diverse Tremblings and Warblings of Sounds, which in their Originalle are Entire. Wee represent and imitate all Articulate Sounds and Letters, and the Voices and Notes of Beasts and Birds. Wee have certain Helps, which sett to the Eare doe further the Hearing greatly. Wee have also diverse Strange and Artificiall Echos's, Reflecting the Voice many times, and as it were Tossing it: And some that give back the Voice lowder than it come, some Shriller, some Deeper; Yea some rendering the Voice, Differing in the letters or Articulate Sound, from that they receyve, Wee have also means to convey Sounds in Trunks and Pipes, in strange Lines, and Distances."

Roger Bacon, The New Atlantis, 1624
This was also pinned on the wall in the old BBC Radiophonic Workshop. Which explains a lot.

Twenty Records To Do The Bolg To

Emergency - Homage To Peace (America)
Astral Social Club - Octuplex (VHF)
United Supreme Council - OASTEM! Vibe Orchestra (Eclipse)
Anthony Joseph & The Spasm Band (Heavenly Sweetness)
Frank Lowe - The Flam (Black Saint)
Gato Barbieri - Vol.1: In Latin America (Impulse!)
Skullflower - Circulus Vitiosus Deus (Turgid Animal)
Marc Houle - Bay Of Figs (m_nus)
Kleistwahr - The Return (Noiseville)
The Chris McGregor Group - Very Urgent (Fledg'ling)
La Otracina - Blood Moon Rising (Holy Mountain)
Our Love Will Destroy The World - Stillborn Plague Angels (Dekorder)
Vibracathedral Orchestra - The Momentary Aviary (Manhand)
X-102 - Rediscovers The Rings Of Saturn (Tresor)
Absu - Absu (Candlelight)
Growing - All The Way (The Social Registry)
Sun Araw/Predator Vision - Split (Not Not Fun)
John Surman - How Many Clouds Can You See? (Deram)
B.F. Trike - B.F. Trike (Rockadelic)
Mike Cooper - Tu Fuego (Qbico)

New Bolg!

Yes, bolg. It sounds better than blog, which is the noise you make if you hack up an entire hardboiled egg. More soon, I've only just started drinking...